It’s not fair

We were supposed to be first.

I f—ing hate that Beth and Anthony are pregnant now. I am so mad and jealous that I could cry. Why do they get to have their baby and we don’t? They haven’t even been married a year and already they get their baby. I hate that we have been trying and trying for 2 freaking years and they just get to pop out a baby. And the fact that they are part of the 3 families that I grew up with makes it that much worse. Now they’re all going to be obsessed with “the first grandchild in our group”. Jamie was the first grandchild. I’m sitting here making appointments to try and maybe, possibly, conceive a child, and they just casually announce it on Facebook?! Do they not realize that doing that would rip into my heart? It physically hurts, and I am so angry I could scream. I don’t want them to lose their baby, I don’t want anyone to lose their baby. But it should be OUR TURN!!!!!

I hate this. I hate that I hate them for having a baby, but I do. And she’s my best friend’s sister. I hate them.


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